Friday, May 1, 2009

The Challenge

My mother has told me that at a young age I always knew what I wanted to accomplish and made sure it would happen. Apparently I insisted on using a real cup at a young age and proclaimed my independence on my 2nd birthday. Basically I was done wearing diapers and letting her pick out my clothes. I know there are many people out there who don't really appreciate my lack of fashion but since I haven't cared yet, I don't know if I ever will.

Clothing choices aren't the reason for this blog post, it was more to do with the challenges I'm starting to realize. Although I have failed before a number of times there have only been a few times in my life when I've felt my efforts are yielding very little improvement. There were a couple of classes in college like that (no other details will be told on this topic) and there have been a few times when I haven't been able to accomplish some physical task I want to achieve. The knack for swimming is one of those instances.

I know I have a much greater swimming ability than the majority of the world but I'm pretty sure most of the people out there don't ever go to a pool so it's not a fair comparison. I also know a lot of people who swim a lot less than me (Michael included) and swim as as well or better than I do. A number of them learned how to swim as kids but there are others who learned as adults and seemed to pick up this elusive skill.

I keep heading over to the pool and still haven't figured out the secret to this mystical motion referred to as swimming. Unfortunately for me, I have also gotten a bit slower since I've been pregnant.

That in itself is not the big challenge, the big challenge is learning to accept where I'm at. Although I know it's normal to be slowing down a bit and I need to be gaining weight, it's still a little difficult to allow without a fight. I want to be getting fitter and faster, not the reverse. That part of my brain that always knows what it wants tells me that I should be able to run and ride my trainer all the way through my pregnancy, regardless of what season it is. It tells me that I should be just as strong and swim just as fast because I don't want to move backwards from where I'm at now. That's the challenge, allowing myself to change in a direction that counters my usual goals.


Summer said...

I wasn't prepared for how the slowdowns would affect me during pregnancy (though my swimming hasn't suffered too much) and after pregnancy. Coming back has been really really really hard.